Goodbye, dirtpile

I'm going to miss my view of the dirt pile. Or maybe it's more of a ditch. I now have pretty much the same view as before, but better. Of course, I don't have the dirt pile. I got used to that pile of dirt with random trees and weeds growing in it. I would sometimes see the odd groundhog running around. Sometimes the ditch became more presentable. Sometimes a bulldozer would come to try to give it a facelift. Sometimes more dirt was added to the collection. It was a work of art.
I'm going to miss hanging out on my balcony and knowing that the only people that could easily see me were construction workers and those stuck in traffic on the Gardiner with superpower eyesight. That they'd wonder what kind of a weirdo would nap in the sun on her lounge chair. Sometimes I would pull down my Alinghi cap so low thinking that if I couldn't see anyone, no one would be able to see me. I never did end up sleeping overnight on my balcony. It wouldn't have really been an under-the-stars experience like I'd made it out to be in my head anyway. I did curl up under a blanket and let my mind wander on a couple chilly nights though.
The dirt pile was supposed to become a low-rise building. Containing two schools, some residential units and something else that I can't seem to remember. The condo corporation is now trying to swing putting in a 40-something floor high-rise. Unobstructed view, gone! The board is hoping to compromise with a 14 floor building.
It's nice to have a second space to hang out in. I kind of like the emptiness of it. No distractions except for the dirt pile and the rest of the view. And full amenities too. A girl could really get a lot accomplished here if she wanted. Much more enjoyable of a space compared to the no-windowed room in the ivory tower. One day I hope to move on to a room with a view. On top of that, perhaps I will become super rich and have a completely vacant unit to hang out in.

Another nod to a great busker

I've made a quick mention of this busker before, but this article gives a little bit more insight into who he is. I hadn't heard any updates about what he'd been up to recently, so it was great to read about some new adventures. It's kind of interesting. I mean, I know lots about his life and I'm sure he knows lots about mine, but I don't know if we've official met. We must have. As kids or something.

It's sale season

Although it seems like the city is perpetually on sale, we're now getting into the nitty gritty, end of season sales. They are everywhere, but I've been pretty good about staying away from shops so that I won't be tempted to buy anything. Last week, I did go window shopping just so that I could get out a bit. It was a pretty nerve wracking week.
I hadn't gone into Davids for quite some time and I was in the mood to pretend to be able to afford a new pair of shoes, so a little visit ensued. I had been eyeing the black suede Louboutin Globe booties for quite some time, so I decided to put them on in my moment of make-believe. They were splendid. I had thought that the detailing was all cutouts, but the gold made them better than I thought they would be. I also tried on another more sensible pair of shoes, which were also quite nice, but they were also part of my make believe romp. I would like a pair of booties, but all the ones I like seem to be insanely priced. How predictable.
I was also thinking that although I'd love to wear fabulous outfits everyday, I don't think I live in a world where those fabulous outfits exist. I'm not talking about the money aspect of it (for once), but I just think I live in a world where it doesn't makes sense to dress like a superstar. Not only do I not like to stand out in a crowd, but I don't know if it's appropriate for my life right now (or ever, I'm sure). Come to think of it, there's probably only a teenie weenie percentage of the Toronto population where these fabulous outfits would be deemed appropriate. Or maybe I'm just oversensitive and I should be glam regardless. Oh well, I'll never have to worry about it - shoes from Davids are part of my la la land collection.

Friends forever

Oh debt, you and I will be friends for many years to come. I will tend to you with bi-weekly payments and in 5 years you will probably try to screw me over by raising my interest rate. Thanks.

Adulthood

Tomorrow, unless something goes terribly wrong, I'll be holding the biggest cheque that I've ever held. It's strange how a little piece of paper can be worth so much. I still feel like it's all play money. Monopoly money, if you will, just not quite as colourful. I wonder when it's going to hit. Little things have made me slowly realize that I'm taking the next step towards adulthood, but when is this one really going to sink in. November was a terrifying month. I just wanted December to hurry up and be over. January has been a stressful time, but soon it should hit. At least, I sure hope so. I need to get back to my regular life. There's too many other things that I need to start concentrating on.

An anniversary of sorts

15 years ago, I officially quit figure skating. Since then, and probably due to that difficult decision, I went back on the ice to start my career, reclaimed my love for the sport and proceeded to skate more than I ever did as a young athlete. I found success in the sport like I never had, improved more than I could have imagined, became more involved in the figure skating community and ended up pushing myself to become an elite athlete. I'm sure that I would have never ventured down this path had I not decided to quit skating all those years ago. Perhaps my path would have led me to extraordinary experiences had I continued to skate, but my actual journey has been atypical and, well, interesting to say the least. In many ways, it's shaped me to be the person who I am today.
No matter how much skating I've done since then, I still consider 1995 the year that I quit figure skating. All of my on-ice adventures in the past little while have been...I'm not sure what I can call it. A hobby? A whim? A chance to strive for something that I never imagined possible?
Right now, I'm at a crossroads. There's nothing more that I can aim for. At this moment, there isn't an outlet for the type of skating that I wish to pursue or at the calibre that I need given where my life has taken me for the moment. In the summer, I may be able to get some ice time and work on my next goal (although, not quite at the same kind of level as my other most recent ones). The most plausible solution for the time being, which I've kind of ended up doing, is to stop skating altogether, but it's been difficult. I have managed to find another outlet to distract myself from the skating void and it was going pretty well until just recently, when I had to confront my demons. I still feel like there's more to accomplish, but I have to try to see the light at the end of the tunnel and focus on all the other wonderful things that I have due to my decision to, ummm, not quit (because that's what I did in 1995), but take a break from skating.
It's hard to stop altogether when you've got a lovely pair of skates in your closet with fancy blades that you invested in. I just got home from the rink. It's the second time that I've been skating since the big break up (that's what it feels like). Tonight was much better than the first time. I was so proud of myself. I did everything that I could do 15 years ago. I think it will help me to get over my break up by going back to the mindset that I'm a freeskater. I just happen to be a freeskater with dance blades. The sooner I forget about turns and footwork, the faster I can get over my sadness. I was so proud that I landed a bunch of 2Lo. I admit that I didn't try any combinations tonight, but I was so happy at everything else that I did do.
I am happy to still be involved in the sport, just at a different capacity - I guess it's only normal to go through a period of adjustment after you quit. Albeit 15 years after the fact. Maybe if I continue to focus on my off-ice skating goals, I'll start to forget about the on-ice ones that were out of my control. The only problem is that I'm not sure how much control I have over these goals either.
But the most important thing is that I can still jump! I can't believe it. After all this time...I've still got it!

I'm a Robarts Library user!

I probably could have gone through my entire university career without setting foot into a university library...and I've been a university student for many years. We're lucky these days to have so many resources online.
I did go into Robarts Library once before, but it was a quick in and out and I really had no idea what else was in there, let alone did I want to find out. For someone who loves walking through libraries (I like the architecture and the smell of books, even though I don't really like to read), I was pretty intimidated by that building.
Although many university libraries are beautiful on the inside, the atmosphere is totally different compared to other libraries with picture books and magazines. You see, they're usually filled with stressed out students. Students who are very studious, or, at least, much more studious than me. I get all anxious and filled with self-doubt. I usually like to live in a state of awesomeness.
Robarts is no exception and it's ginormous. I didn't even know how to begin to find the book that I needed. Luckily, the friendly information crew didn't laugh in my face and gave me a guide to the library. I get the feeling that I'm not the only one who's at a loss when entering the building. I had no idea that there are 14 (14!!!) floors to the building. You never would have guessed from its avian-looking exterior. I was thrown off by the guard that checked your ID before letting you into the elevator and then zoomed up to the 11th floor to find my book. I give the building props. It's a well run machine. I mean, there are different drop boxes for books depending on their call number. Everything is clearly marked, and there really is no reason to feel like you'll get lost in the place. It was pretty obvious where I needed go.
I quietly oooh-ed and aaah-ed the motion sensored light switched at the ends of each row in the stacks. I applaud their efforts at saving energy. I quickly found my book and used a footstool that was conveniently placed at the end of the row.
I was pretty sure that I wanted to wait in line to check out my book with a human when the info crew told me that I could go to a self check-out kiosk. More stuff aimed to intimidate. Of course, there was nothing to worry about. Having conquered finding my book, I figured that the self check-out might be just as fun as its counterpart in the grocery store (I love them). Sure enough, I had a ball of a time checking out my book.
I wouldn't be surprised if I never have to go to Robarts again (except to return my book), but if I do, I won't be so scared.
The only thing that could have made the experience more entertaining would have been if the stacks had those rolling shelves. I'm not talking about the ladders attached to the wall that roll around so you can reach the books at the top of the shelves built into the walls, I'm talking those crazy shelves with the big steering wheel attached to the end of the row and rows of shelves are all stuck together to save space. Now that would have been pretty awesome.

Mental note

Sobeys is having some crazy sale today. Maybe it's shipment day and they want to clear out stock. Mental note, check out the store next Tuesday to see if it's a weekly thing. If I can figure out when this overpriced store has some deals, I can be the ultimate lazybones.